The Values That Matter Now: Empath Midlife Reset
Redefining Your Values as an Empath in Midlife
As empaths, we often take on the emotions, expectations, and even the values of those around us. But what happens when we reach a point in life where those borrowed beliefs no longer serve us? Empath midlife isn't just about aging; it’s about waking up to the truth of who we are and what we truly need to thrive.
Recently, I was asked to narrow down my core values to just three words. Simple, right? Not for someone who has spent decades holding space for others—family, students, clients, the world itself. As a highly sensitive person, I’ve learned to carry the weight of many ideals, some of which I never even questioned. But now, as I enter a new phase of life, I know it’s time to release what’s not mine and claim what is.
The Overwhelm of Holding Too Much
One of the hardest lessons for empaths is learning to say no—even to things that seem good on the surface. When we try to hold too much, we fall into a familiar pattern of overwhelm. It shows up as:
Dissociation from our body—feeling ungrounded or disconnected.
A whirlwind of thoughts—constant mental chatter without resolution.
Creative burnout—starting projects with enthusiasm but never finishing them.
Exhaustion that self-care can’t fix—deep depletion of body, mind, and spirit.
I’ve lived this cycle, and I know I’m not alone. But here’s what I’ve come to understand: we are not meant to hold everything. We are meant to hold what is sacred, aligned, and uniquely ours.
Reclaiming My True Values
After deep reflection, I chose three values to guide me forward: Creativity, Freedom, and Spirituality. These aren’t just words—they are a map back to myself.
Creativity: Returning to My Inner Child
As a child, music was my constant companion. I told stories to my dolls, created imaginary worlds, and expressed myself freely. But over the years, responsibility took precedence, and creativity got pushed aside. Now, I choose to reclaim creativity as a non-negotiable part of my life—through writing, sound healing, oracle cards, energy work, and somatic therapy. Creativity isn’t just about art; it’s about allowing myself to exist fully and unapologetically.
Freedom: Releasing Generational Scarcity
On the surface, I have freedom—I live in a country where I can make my own choices. But inner freedom? That’s a different story. Like many empaths, I carry ancestral imprints of lack and survival fear, passed down from generations who had no choice but to struggle. But I refuse to let that define me any longer. Freedom, for me, means shedding outdated survival patterns and stepping into a mindset of abundance and possibility.
Spirituality: Entering the Wisdom Years
According to Ayurveda, I am entering the Vata phase of life—the time of air, space, and cosmic expansion. Indigenous traditions call this the wisdom years, a time to embody the lessons learned and step into deeper spiritual guidance. My spirituality is no longer about seeking; it is about remembering who I’ve always been. It’s about trusting that my soul already knows the way.
What Are Your Values Now?
If you had to choose only three values—ones that are yours, not inherited, not borrowed—what would they be? What truly matters to you now, in this phase of life?
Because here’s the truth: When we get clear on our values, we simplify our purpose. We see our life from a higher vantage point—what Richard Rohr calls “The Further Journey”, or the second half of life where we stop proving ourselves and start living in alignment.
But these values aren’t set in stone. You can change them as you grow, as you evolve. What matters is that they reflect the Light of who you already are.
And if you wrestle with this decision… Good.
It means you're taking it seriously.
Your next season of life with these new values will unfold as it is meant to.
Brenda Carey, Holistic Healer for Highly Sensitive Souls
